Longing for a sunset
by Mareterna
Summary: Kathryn and Chakotay's bond grows deeper but is thrown apart when Chakotay is forced to leave the ship. JC a sappy romance for the hopeless romanrics out there. please R&R thanks
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in my story; I owe them all to the brilliant minds at Paramount! I commend you all!!  
  
Author's note: Welp here it is, my first fiction! I encourage you all to R&R I'd love to hear what you think. I know my writing can get thick with description, but I hope the descriptions with draw you in, and not make you want to skim the story. Let me know what you think!  
  
Longing for the Sunset  
  
Warm breezes sifted through the expansive cornfields on a cool summer night. A colorful sunset sparkled behind the lush green stalks, and a few distant stars reached out yearning to take their place in the night sky. Kathryn took a slow cleansing breath letting herself be taken into the depths of her surroundings, her home. The Indiana wind brushed slowly around her airy skirt weaving between her legs and letting her take off into a world known only by her. Her eyes gradually opened and she gasped in horror as the sunset, the, cornfields and all of her surroundings melted into a dull gray. She tried to fight through the fog longing to see her home again, but everything reappeared as her cold , lonely quarters in the middle of the Delta Quadrant  
  
She lay there for a few short minutes savoring the dream, the feeling of being home again. Just as she felt herself begin to relax again the computer barked, "Good morning, it is 0600 hours."  
  
Kathryn reluctantly climbed out of bed, feeling somewhat depressed with what lay before her that day. Oh yes, she loved her job, she loved the work, the satisfaction of it, but mostly the people. Tom Paris was one of them, well he was one of those people who really could make an ordinary day a little bit more on the bright side. Even though she appeared as if she didn't appreciate his comical comments on the bridge she really felt they lightened the mood. She also loved Harry Kim; his young eagerness always excited her. And, of course Chakotay, oh yes Chakotay, she loved so much about him too. Sure he was very handsome, a good officer, but it was more than that that made her like him. He had this kind, loving sense about him, something that really drew her to him. She needed someone like that, someone with a lot of warmth and comfort, someone to ease her pain.  
  
Pain, was something that plagued her life. However, she did not draw sorrow from that pain but strength, and courage. Still, it would be soothing to have someone like him to calm her hold her, and keep her as more than just a friend. She hated admitting that to herself, she was the captain, could she ever permit herself to truly love her first officer, let alone anyone. Kathryn stepped into the sonic shower and let it's massaging mists take her away from Voyager , even if just for a few minutes.  
  
Chakotay let his hand brush swiftly over his paper. Just a few minutes before he was due on the bridge and he needed something to ordinate his thoughts, this was a perfect remedy for stress. He let his creative side take over, shading areas of his drawing in a sweeping motion. No one knew of his hidden talent, no one, not even Kathryn, even though it was of her he drew. Her stunning features, her breathy movements, and her soft reddish brown hair that seemed like it would met at your fingertips, were so irresistible to his pencil.  
  
"Computer time," He commanded almost breathless "0650" it replied in a harsh monotone He set down his pencil and paper then set off to face the day.  
  
"At least Kathryn will be there," Chakotay thought as he made long strides down the corridor, "she makes everyday sitting on the bridge worth while."  
  
As Kathryn arrived on the bridge she was greeted by a warm smile and a , "Good morning Kathryn," from Chakotay. She stood there for a moment letting her heart melt and her eyes remain locked into his, then she nodded briskly and descended to her chair. Chakotay's eyes followed her the whole way down, and she couldn't help but blush a bit. She grinned on the outside, but deep down she remembered her rank, her status, her mission, but most of all dream that had made her feel to lonely. The smile began to fade from her face, and turned into a stern frown. Chakotay must of sensed her loneliness, because he asked her if everything was alright.  
  
"I'm fine," she whispered, "Just missing home ..." His eyes moistened with concern. "I know Kathryn, I know." He gently reached for her hand and softly tangled her fingers in his, his thumb caressing the back of her hand.  
  
"We'll get home," he assured her, "I know we will." It helped to know that someone else shared her burden.  
  
They sat like that on the bridge for a long time, each savoring the others touch.  
  
A while later Chakotay grinned broadly and piped up, "I need something I can throw."  
  
Kathryn looked at him confused, "Commander?"  
  
"Everyday I sit here staring at the top of Tom's, and you have no ideah how badly I've wanted to chuck something at him sometimes."  
  
Janeway chuckled, "Well I can't blame you but if you harm my ship in any way I may be forced to reprimand you."  
  
"Well what could be better? I get to hit on Paris, and then get taken out by the captain."  
  
"Watch it mister," Janeway warned, "Or I may be forced to do just that."  
  
There was a long pause in the conversation, till she finally finished by saying, "Dinner tonight?"  
  
"Only if Paris can join us," he teased, "No , of course, I'd love to ."  
  
Kathryn smiled then scooted off to her ready room to work on some reports. Tom Paris sent a few scolding glances at his former rival, and spat out an "I'll get you for that."  
  
Chakotay smiled. He had her under his hood.  
  
It'll get better I promise (!! Let me know what you think and if I should add on more chapters! Tootles! 


	2. Home is where there is a sunset

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters in my story they all belong to the luscious people, well maybe that's not the right word, anyways they belong to the people of Paramount!!  
  
Author's Note: Thank you for the reviews ( , they excite me and make me want to write more!!! Let me know what you think of Chapter 2!!  
  
Warm candlelight flickered through Kathryn's quarters as she prepared the meal for that night. She felt so, calm so at peace, just like the dancing flame, and her heart played a soft tune of girlish joys. She couldn't stop dreaming about today's events on the bridge, she touched her hand, in a way she could still feel the warmth of his touch. She'd swear something made her love him more everyday.  
  
"Come in," she said facing the replicator, trying to conceal her joy of seeing him again.  
  
Chakotay's footsteps were heard as he glided into the room, he raised his nose in the air and proclaimed," Smells like you succeeded in not burning dinner for once."  
  
Janeways voice played a teasing tone, "Careful what you say commander or I may change the special to burnt Chakotay al la maul."  
  
He smiled and stood behind his seat, never did he sit down before her, "such a gentleman," she thought.  
  
"I brought the wine," he said holding up a handsome bottle the velvety liquid  
  
"Good for you, I hope this is better than Neelix's leola root substitute from last week," she said half serious, half joking, she was still trying to keep the joy of being with him out of her voice.  
  
"Ahh," Chakotay exclaimed, "No this is something I picked up from a trading post not too long ago, the name intrigued me," he studied the label. "It's called 'Vandola Montelizacta be on Cenzanu, hmm quite a name. The Universal translator says it means, 'Fruit of the Montelizacta that forms in the mouth of a warted tree."  
  
Janeway raised an eyebrow, "And you say you were 'intrigued' by the name? Maybe I'll stick with the leola root."  
  
"Well I must say I've never had wine from a 'warted tree,' but what's wrong with being a little exotic once in a while," Chakotay said grinning.  
  
"Being in the Delta Quadrant is exotic enough for me, thank you," Kathryn stated spinning around to face him.  
  
He chuckled, "So what's for dinner?"  
  
"An Italian pasta with vegetables, a roll and butter, oh yes, and your wart infested wine," Kathryn had such an aura about her when she spoke of the food, she sounded very elegant, like a waitress from a fancy restraint. She could even make wart infested wine sound good.  
  
"Sounds delicious, care for the first sip," he teased as he poured a full glass of the rosy-brown solution.  
  
Kathryn glared at him and bravely took a taste of the so-called wine. She winced and mouthed, "Not bad."  
  
Chakotay looked at her amused and taken in by the pleasant reaction he took a gulp from the glimmering glass. "Kathryn," He shouted, "You tricked me, I should know you better!" He continued to choke on the fluid spewing it out like water from a whale's spout.  
  
She just looked at him, a glimmer of evil in her eyes, "How do you say, unbearably bitter."  
  
"That's how I would describe you after this," he snorted, still gagging on warted wine.  
  
They both shared a quiet laugh and settled down to enjoy their meal. Chakotay watched her face across the velvety candlelit table; she was so beautiful to him, almost untouchably beautiful. He reached out to touch her hand lingering on her glass, "So tell me , what made you miss home so much today on the bridge?"  
  
Kathryn took a deep breath, then squeezed his hand and began to tell him of the bittersweet dream. Throughout the course of the story Kathryn's eyes traveled from the table to their linked hands, then to his face and back again. Chakotay's breath tightened, he hated to see her like this, she was so vulnerable to pain, and all he wanted to do was rid her of it and replace the pain with comfort, peace, and happiness.  
  
Kathryn watched Chakotay across the table, a warm light illuminating his tattoo, and casting shadows upon his face. He sat there listening to her so intently, so patiently, with a glimmer of sympathy in his eyes. She could almost taste the hint of love in air between them, a love that may never work out. She sighed and her thoughts drifted back to her home in Indiana, to mother, to Phoebe, to Mark...oh Mark, she had lost him just like Justin, and she knew she could never afford to lose Chakotay. Although that may the only way the path leads, there may be no other alternate trail. She sighed, she hoped that wasn't her fate, she hoped she wouldn't have to let him drift away from her, she needed him, if not only for his friendship, but for the care and concern he had for her. Sure she was strong she would get used to living without him...or could she. Loneliness had always been her biggest fear, and it was easy to drift into that dark cloud when you're on a ship in the middle of space.  
  
The both sat there in silence, hand linked like that morning on the bridge. The soft sounds of Kathryn's music filtered in and calmed them both. Chakotay kept his eyes fixed on Kathryn, studying her, she seemed so peaceful on the outside, even when there was a war brewing on the inside.  
  
"Computer play music Chakotay file 3," he said softly afraid to ruin the moment.  
  
"Do you not like my music commander?" Kathryn spoke in almost a flirtatious tone. "No I love your music," announced sincerely, "it's just no good dancing to... join me?"  
  
He held out his hand and the earnesty in his eyes told her that he wanted more than anything to dance with her, to see her smile, to see a twinkle in her feathery blue eyes. She smiled slightly, and then felt a peace run over her as her lifted her hand to his and whispered, "I'd love to."  
  
She let him lead her to the floor where they began to glide in rhythm to the music. Chakotay held her in his arms, pulling her slightly closer with every step, while behind them the stars outside the view port waltzed along with the couple shimmering against the black of space and making the night even more romantic. Kathryn closed her eyes, trying to savor every moment she had her in his arms, for she knew soon she would long for this night, and soon she would wonder what it once felt like to be here in his arms again. She had never felt so at peace with herself, than when she was with Chakotay. She drew the warmth from his eyes, her strength from his voice, and comfort from his arms, she couldn't stop thinking about how much she didn't want this moment to end. She felt his arms close tighter around her and she let her head lay on his shoulder, for just one brief moment.  
  
Kathryn felt like a young girl who had been caught in an African thunderstorm, tearing through the rain across an endless savannah, searching for help, searching for someone to care. She feels so helpless the depths of relentless rain, until she sees a glowing light in the distance, she follows it trying to push through the falling hail that feels like nails in her face. When she finally reaches the light she comes in shivering and is given more warmth than she could ever imagine. Kathryn sighs, she had finally found her ray in a merciless dark storm.  
  
Kathryn pulled slightly back from Chakotay's grasp, and as she did, she felt his forehead land on hers. Her mind flashed back to her dream, the Indiana sunset, her pulse quickened but she didn't pull away.  
  
"Is everything alright," Chakotay asked, his voice full of concern.  
  
Kathryn smiled, "Yes, because you're here, everything's alright." He smiled back at her and reached out to touch her face savoring the closeness. Her smile broadened as she realized that here was home, here on Voyager would always be her home away from home, her light in the storm, as for the Indiana sunset, well there was one standing right in front of her. Chakotay ,is my Indiana sunset, she smiled again that felt so wonderful. Just like the Indiana sunset he offered her tenderness, reassurance, and peace.  
  
Chakotay lifted his head from Kathryn's, he could hardly believe that all this was happening, here he was holding Kathryn in his arms, and oh he never wanted to let go. He noticed her eyes seemed lost in his, he too was lost in the ocean of her sapphire eyes. He saw such love in them that he couldn't resist to begin to slowly lower his head to hers. Just as their faces were only centimeters apart h, Tuvok's voice filled the room:  
  
"Red alert, Senior Officers to the bridge."  
  
Kathryn opened her eyes and gazed up at him with hints of longing and sadness in them. She reached up and placed her hand on his face, and he closed his eyes for a moment, enjoying her touch, then he took her hand in his, squeezed it and said,  
  
"He sure knows how to ruin a good time," Chakotay said not sure if either of them were completely ready to admit to their feelings.  
  
Kathryn smiled, "Let's get to the bridge."  
  
More to come!!!!! Let me know what you think. Are my characters in character? I would also enjoy suggestions, likes and dislikes. Thanks 


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